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| long update since i've been slackin 
enjoy....
Oh, and the quotes are all Greys Anatomy...
  
Pain, you just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers, you just breath deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed but sometimes the pain gets you where you least expect it. Hits way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can't outrun it and life always makes more.
 
A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying.
  
Maybe were not supposed to be happy. Maybe gratitude has nothing to do with joy. Maybe being grateful is recognizing what you have for what it is, appreciating small victories admiring the strugle it takes simply to be human. Maybe we're thankful for the familar things we know and maybe we're thankful for the things we will never know. At the end of the day the fact that we have the courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate
 
You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true
  
At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away.
 
And still there are times when it just gets away from you. No matter how hard you fight it, you fall. And it's scary as hell. Except there's an upside to freefalling. It's the chance you give your friends to catch you.
  
Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us on the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired. We are scared. Denying it doesn’t change the truth. Sooner or later, we have to put aside our denial and face the world, head on, guns blazing. Denial. It’s not just a river in Egypt. It’s a freakin’ ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?
 
When you were a kid, it was Halloween candy. You hid it from your parents and you ate it until you got sick. In college, it was the heavy combo of youth, tequila and well, you know. As a surgeon, you take as much of the good as you can get because it doesn't come around nearly as often as it should. 'Cause good things aren't always what they seem. Too much of anything, even love, is not always a good thing.
  
It's not a day on the calendar. Not a birthday, not a new year. It's an event, big or small, something that changes us. Ideally, it gives us hope. A new way of living and looking at the world. Letting go of old habits, old memories . . . What's important is that we never stop believing we can have a new beginning. But it's also important to remember that amid all the crap . . . are a few things worth holding on to.
 
In general, lines are there for a reason : for security, for clarity. If you choose to cross the line, you pretty much do so at your own risk. So why is it, that the bigger the line, the greater the temptation to cross it?… we cant help ourselves, we see a line we want to cross it. maybe it’s the thrill of trading the familiar for the unfamiliar, a sort of personal dare. Only problem is once you’ve crossed, its almost impossible to go back. But, if you do manage to make it back across that line, you find safety in numbers.
  
lying is bad, or so we're told constantly from birth. honesty is the best policy, the truth shall set you free, i chopped down the cherry tree. whatever. the fact is lying is a necessity. we lie to ourselves because the truth, the truth freaking hurts
 
Remember when you were a kid and your biggest worry was like, if you'd get a bike for your birthday or if you'd get to eat cookies for breakfast. Being an adult? Totally overrated. I mean seriously, don't be fooled by all the hot shoes and the great sex and the no parents anymore telling you what to do. Adulthood is responsibility.
  
Whoever said What you don't know can't hurt you was a complete and total moron. Because ... for most people I know, not knowing is the worst feeling in the world.
 
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| wow i'm back! ha, it's been a while.... well, i'm changing the picture, to a new icon.. changing the layout, and even updating which it feels like i never have time to do that anymore.... so, leave comments, cause i was thinkin' about being done. but leaving comments, make me think people actually look at this- and i'm not wasting my time. so  you know what to do! ..  have a good night..
Best friends understand every word you're saying
even when you're crying and speaking gibberish<3.
Like do you know she has six smiles?
One when something really makes her laugh.
One when she's making plans.
One when she's laughing out of politeness.
One when she is uncomfortable
One when she is making fun of herself.
And one when..... one when she's talking about her friends
Keep your expectations low, your hopes high, your drinks full, and your true friends by your side.
don't let failure be your reasoning for the refusal of trying new things. the saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.
life doesn't hurt until you think about
how much things have changed, who
you've lost along the way, and about
how much was your fault..
I just want to fall into your arms when
nothing's going my way && i want
you to hold me && tell me that
everything is going to be okayy.*
"And I never knew I could feel so strongly about someone, especially at this age. And the even scarier thing is...I don't know if I ever want to feel this way about anyone but you. But even scarier is knowing that I might not be able to have you back"
"It's the possibility that keeps me going, not the guarantee, a sort of wager on my part, and though you may call me a dreamer, a fool. Or a forgiver. I believe that anything is possible."
Me? I'm scared of everything. I'm scared of what I saw, of what i did, of who I am... but most of all, im scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life, the way i feel when i'm with you -Dirty Dancing
I need you now and forever
So stay right here with me
Don't ever leave
Love was kept from me like a secret
And I swore that I was through
Until you, until you
If you could only see the way he loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue his eyes can be when he says
When he says he loves me
It's the sugar-high rush im constantly on, the butterflies in my stomach, the way I cant go 5 minutes without saying your name It's the way I could lay in your arms forever and not say a word. It's the way you know what to say, and when to say it, and for the first time in my life, I feel amazing about myself. And this time, I'm being treated like I never thought I deserved to be.
Lie to me.
Give me something worth living for
Tell me a reason worth fighting for
Give me anything
Anything to keep me breathing.
Maybe its the way you say my name, or the way I get butterflies everytime we kiss, or the way you make me laugh when nothing is even funny.. whatever it is.. I just can't let you go.
Promise me, that's all I want.
Just a promise that you will never forget me.
Tell me I changed you somehow.
Let me know that I had an impact on your life.
Promise me that you will always remember me.
Losing you was hard enough,
But I don't want to go on knowing
that I meant absolutely nothing to you.
We can build this thing together,
Stand in stone forever, Nothing's gonna stop us now.
And if this world runs out of lovers we'll still have eachother.
Nothing's gonna stop us now
What would you say if I asked you not to go?
To forget everyone & forget everything
Start over with me.
Would you take my hand and never let me go?
Promise me you'll never let me go.
And now the stars aren't out tonight,
But neither are we to look up at them
Why does hello feel like goodbye?
These memories can't replace,
These wishes I wished and dreams I chased
Take this broken heart and make it right
when everything inside me looks like everything i hate, you are the hope i have for change, you are the only chance i'll take
where do i start laying on a blanket underneath the stars with your head on my chest i always liked that best i hate how time flys i still think back sometimes back, your lips on my neck i always liked that best that time we took a ride ended up down by the river side soft touch wet kiss i always liked that best i liked the way you used to hold me i like the way you came to know me you came to me well well well well...falling to sleep weearing your shirt bc it smelled so sweet who could for get i always liked that best i could go on so many things i miss now that your gone your love...oh yes i always liked that best
winter just wasn't my season
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
Hypocrites, you're all here for the very same reason
'Cause you can't jump the track,we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl,
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe, just breathe
You've been a constant headache for me.
If it came down to this act
or one more near heart attack,
you wouldn't have a hope in hell,
I know that I'm responsible for this,
and I'll miss you.
Maybe, in time..
I'll find out what it is that I'm supposed to do.
I've made a million messes..
and I'll make a million more.
...maybe I'm not the girl you're searching for.
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| wow, very sorry... been really busy, now i'm off to class, so i have no time to update... but i promise one here within the next few days! thanks for all the support . .
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